$? $? $? is that what its all about?

ah. i never thought this would make anyone hurt. i thought we were family.

everyone says life is like a wheel.

basic necessities were never a concern. i have food, clothing, shelter, and good education which promises me a bright future. but i know things are never going to be easy forever. now, yes, i still have food, clothing, shelter, and good education, but things are never the same now. i have grown. which would mean my concerns about things around me should also grow.

i have noticed this since i was little - that i am a bit too calculative when it comes to money. it was a good way to educate me when i was little - to tell me that money does not come free. to tell me that we should save in most things that are possible. to teach me not to waste.

but today, i have grown. being too calculative sometimes make me feel like i am a stingy person. being too calculative makes me feel that i am not loved. it makes me feel that we are here together only because and for business, not here because or for any other purpose.

speaking frankly, at first i couldnt tune in with the way things were in yemen - in the monthly expenses sense. i was very detailed. very. farah and alia especially had to give in to my attitude, we split bills for every single thing we could.

but later, i guess it was becoz of the stronger bonds between us that that made us become less calculative. no, i mean, it made ME less calculative. the two of them were not since the beginning. looking back, now i understand why is it important to SHARE. no, by this i do not mean bringing a tupperware of delicious food and sharing with the whole class. there's so much more in sharing.

my sister was commenting the other day, kenapa kalau her friends mintak abang/kakak diorang duit belanja, selambaa je. uhuh. kitorang? the word 'claim' is always heard. frankly nela, can we become like other people? we can start it, cant we? i mean, kalau 500 bucks tu maybe lain cerita la, tapi setakat 50 bucks which all of us can afford? we're family arent we?


**note tu farah: lain kali keluar makan, kne make a point utk keluarkan lebih sikit dari my pocket :P biar ajar jadi pemurah sikit. ^__^ tapi jgn la sampai bankrupt. heheh**


~~haha. snanye nak post pasal benda lain. takpelah. for the real issue, let's keep it private~~