i said i believe in myself; but at the same time i'm afraid of myself. i fear for the attitude i have. i fear for the habits i have. i fear for the choices i make - from the big ones to the tiny2 day to day decisions. i often forget that these daily actions, when brought together, have a great bearing on my future.
today i have lost a very big opportunity right in from of my eyes. and i couldnt bring myself to 'forgive myself', for it was totally 100% my fault. i have, in so many occasions that i have no control over, believed that God knows what is best for me. but what happens when things go wrong during the times that i didnt put in sufficient effort? yes i can blame myself, but what use is there to blame myself and only regret? is there anything that i can even do to get back the lost opportunity?
people say that you wont be able to change your attitude until an episode in life makes you truly regret it. i hope that the significant opportunity lost is great enough of a bearing to make me realize things and change for good.
at the end of the day, i still lost the opportunity. and i am mad at myself for losing it.
time goes by
on the wings of a butterfly
and what goes with it is all that you have
really. that is all you truly have.
.: HeSheng Mansion :.-Nikon D90-
1 comment:
From my buku doa:
"The strong believer is better and more beloved to Allah than the weak believer and there is goodness in both. Strive for that which will benefit you, seek help from Allah and do not despair. If a mishap should happen to befall you then do not say 'If only I had acted...such and such would have happened.' Rather, say 'Qaddarallahu wa maa shaa afa'ala.'( Allah has decreed and what He wills, He does).
...for verily 'if' lets in the work of the devil."
Auntie Mimi
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